On Ebola.

“MISS! Do you think we’re going to get Ebola now?”
“No.”
“But it’s in DALLAS.”
“Have you touched, kissed, hugged or been coughed on by a person with Ebola?”
“Well, no.”
“Has anyone you know had any of those things happen?”
“Noooo…”
“You’re fine.”
“But Miss-”
“Look. Here’s what I’m going to tell you: you’re not going to get Ebola.”
“What if I do?”
“If anyone in this class gets Ebola, I will bring you all cupcakes and Yoohoo, okay?”
<Most of class cheers.>
“Wait- wait- but if I have Ebola, I’ll be in the hospital.”
“I’ll bring it to the hospital.”
“For real?”
“For real. I’ll even put on one of those suits so I can bring it to you in person and apologize or lying.”
“Okay, Miss. As long as I get that cupcake. I like the ones with sprinkles, by the way.”
“What, are you planning on getting Ebola now?”
“I kinda want, to, yeah. I like cupcakes.”

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