On test questions.

“Who did this test, Miss?”
“Mrs. W—– and I. Why?”
“Y’all ask more questions than my mom when she asks me if I’m going somewhere.”

On peer futures.

<I look, astounded, at some rather…shoddy work a student turned in, as a different kiddo approaches the desk.>

“Miss, that kid’s going places. I mean, not college…but places.”

On a six pack.

“I’m all muscle under here.”
“You do not have a six pack. Like, not even a little one.”
“I do, I just love it so much that I hide it under a layer of fatness to keep it safe.”

 

On how prescription glasses work.

“Miss, why you have your sunglasses on? We’re inside.”
“They’re prescription, guys. I haven’t had time to switch, and if I take them off altogether, I can’t see.”
“Do it!”
<I roll my eyes and comply.>
“You’re all blurry now. Just little blobs of color.”
“WAIT. Am I still black?”
“Yes – a prescription doesn’t change the color of what I see.”
“Oh. Damn. It’d be cool if it turned me like, Asian or something.”